Thirteen

He would tell complete strangers that his parents didn't love him because they wouldn't give him a baby brother. We showed him, I guess.

Back in the day, he prefered a very clean cut look. He could eat an entire bowl of rice at 12 months old without spilling a single grain.

Henry taught him about getting messy. To this day, he still doesn't enjoy it.

A city street in the background, which is how he prefers it (and continuously reminds us that country life isn't for him). And his music should be from this century, thank-you-very-much.

He's the funniest person I know.

Home, matey

My boy is home from his ultra-long sailing adventure. He was roughing it around the waters of Vancouver Island in Canada. Apparently, there was also a fair amount of barfing on his part. Because he's my kid, and we don't consider any trip complete without a fair amount of vomiting involved. That's just how we roll. Thankfully, Dylan's (his buddy lying in the above photo) dad didn't send me this shot until Jack was safely home in my arms:

The rest of the kids had a pretty tough time missing their brother. For one thing, he's the only one who knows how to operate the Wii or the DVD player (that's my story and I'm sticking to it), but they really did miss him. Grace went so far as to adopt a "baby Jack" and she would set it up in his place at mealtimes.

Seamus was most aggrieved. He woke us up during the night with his whining for his boy. Olivia did her best to comfort him.

Alas:

My boy is back tomorrow, finally. Gone too long.

Fivesome

I took the three youngest to pick strawberries today. Good, clean, wholesome family activity, no? Except Olivia ate every strawberry that she came in contact with and Grace picked a total of three strawberries in 45 minutes. The rest of the time consisted of commentary regarding the appearance of said strawberries, or tripping over strawberry plants and complaining of injuries sustained while tripping. Then, she had to poop, so we left. The end.

Jack's been gone three days now on a fabulous sailing trip through Canada's islands. He's with a very good friend, and I finally heard from him last night. Seasick, migraine. I was frantic, trying to figure out how to get up there to fetch him while Mitch waited all day in line trying to get his passport renewed. He called today and I could tell he was back to normal, because he said, "Do you know how much this is going to cost? You're not taking this out of my cell phone bill, are you?"

Then, this Facebook message from him:

"Its really fun. We accidentally got lost in the porn district today and we're scarred for life. it was in Vancouver. Im having a great time. theres a shower bye love ya"

Only a week and a half until he gets back.

Low Tide

Record low tides sent us beachcombing this week. The kids found all kinds of cool stuff.

However, nothing was quite as interesting as their ice cream cones from Kapaw's. Those are deep piles of mussels they're standing on.

Stick covered in seastars.

Father's Day

Heading to the beach, the wind in our fur...

A little screen time with the king:

Easing into vacation

Summer vacation. Day 4

We spent the week cleaning out the garage. See that big pile of crap in the corner?

Let me move in a little closer:


Kittens are magic because they can make a moody adolescent do this :

Okay, he was totally posing for that photo. But I know he feels that way on the inside!

Meow

They hate the ugly little kittens!

Menagerie

We've been trying to eat healthier, and one way we're doing that is by cutting our meat consumption by half. You might think this would be harder on Mitch or Olivia, both of whom like a little meat with their meat on their plates. However, the biggest adjustment has been by the family dog. Seamus pretended to enjoy his leftover tidbits of felafel and quinoa, but the other night while I was washing dishes, he showed me just how pleased he was to be going vegetarian. I was looking out the kitchen window when I saw him hop up and snatch a mama bird right out of the birdhouse. Then, he trotted over to the window and proceeded to chow down in front of me. Don't worry, we're working on giving him plenty of lunch meat snacks in the future.

Yesterday, Jack and I were helping Mitch move the small chicken coop over to my stinging nettle garden. As we lifted it, a nice family of rats scampered out from under it. I'm sure any of you reading this probably heard my blood-curdling scream. We've also found evidence of rats out in the shed, so, I had to pour myself a giant glass of wine. After the wine, I decided we needed an outdoor farm cat. I know! What a great idea, right? I looked on Freecycle, and the VERY FIRST POST was an offer of two free 8 week-old kittens. Since I believe in fate while drinking, I contacted the generous kitten-offerer and within an hour, our kittens were settled in.
The kids want to name them Charlie and Lola, but I'm calling them Chardonnay and Reality.

Seamus didn't think his life could suck any harder until last night.

i kan groe fud

I'm growing stuff. In the distance, just to the right of the chicken coop and behind the fenced in "stinging nettle garden (don't ask. I had the idea to expand the vegetable space so I'd have a cutting garden)" is the kitchen garden.Let's move in a little closer, shall we?

Last year was my first attempt at a vegetable garden. I grew slugs, weeds, a few spotty potatoes, weeds, slugs, and the odd carrot or two. Oh, and about three sugar snap peas. This year I read books about gardening throughout the winter, and look! Real food. As you can see, I'm still rather excellent at growing weeds, too. I've been trying all kinds of organic slug control, and the slugs aren't as invasive this year.

The bonus of having the coop next to the garden (besides the excellent poop) is that I can just toss both the weeds and slugs over the fence to them. I still have a row or two that I have no clue what's growing (the kids did most of the planting), but Henry's potatoes are looking beautious, and he keeps them weed free, too. Olivia still has zero interest in the actual gardening, but she eats everything we grow. She'll be running around outside, pop into the garden, stuff some lettuce or a carrot or spinach in her mouth, and run back out. Grace is fascinated by the sugar snap peas the girls have growing in their little garden. She measures them every day. You can sort of see them climbing up the bamboo:

And everywhere you look are nasturtiums. I gave the kids all packets of nasturtium seeds and they put some in every pot and all throughout the garden. I'm so country, I think I'm going to go hitch up the team and go to Starbucks. Oh. Wait. Dang.

Gah, it's like 90 in the shade this week

Did you know you could buy Build-A-Bears at the Great Wolf Lodge? It's true. You just have to have an auntie who sends you money (unlike the MEAN auntie who sends Wal-Mart gift cards so I have to go there and stand in the pink aisle for an eternity or until I poke my eye out with a $5 bonfire poker, whichever comes first). Note they're choices in animals and outfits. So predictable!I promised the girls I would let them make, frost, and decorate their own cake for their birthday, but since we were busy spending our retirement fund at the GWL on their special day, today became that day. I forgot to take pictures, but it's not anything I'd like to remember, so it's really for the best. Let's just say I feel pretty much the same way about sprinkles that I do about glitter, and there were a LOT of sprinkles. I actually had to step outside the house while they went to town. They also licked a lot off of their hands, to the point where I think they're going to have some lovely purple and pink turds tomorrow. Aaaaand, your welcome!

Six days left of school, yay! Jack got an academic award today, and he wisely waited until his Dad had had a glass of wine to mention it, and could he have a video camera for his birthday (You know, so he can document the hell that we put him through on a daily basis)?

Henry is happier than anyone that school is almost out. He's been grumpy from the heat and grass pollen, but one would hardly be able to tell unless they knew him really well or they were his little sisters.

Six.

5-28-03 Olivia, 5lbs 9oz and Grace, 4lbs, 9oz

5-28-09 Olivia, 45 lbs, and Grace, 50 lbs

This year the girls decided they really wanted to go to the Great Wolf Lodge for their birthday. For those not in the know, the GWL is a hotel/indoor water park/gimmicky money sucking machine about three hours from our house. And since it was on the way, we had to go to the Rainforest Cafe for lunch and a Volcano. For those not in the know, the RC is a restaurant/rainforest wannabe/gimmicky money sucking machine about two hours from our house.

This is a volcano and a six year-old. After lunch, Grace had it in her head that she couldn't get through her birthday without a new birthday dress. With jewels on it. Olivia had no interest in dress shopping, so she hung out with the boys while Grace and I hit the stores. She found her dream dress and wore it right out of the store (yes, Aunt Marci, it was on sale). You may not be able to see the GIANT plastic jewels across the front, but believe me, they are very prominent.

And finally, we arrived and my kids went apeshit when they saw the place. Here the girls are at pajama story time with a big, furry thing.

Below are the boys coming out of the tornado, which is guaranteed to give you diarrhea if you open your eyes when hitting the first drop (your welcome!). Henry didn't even want me to do it, so worried was he that I would actually die. He even had the sad, watery eyes when I finally succombed to Jack's taunting and went for it. And it was fun! In a diarrhea-inducing sort of way.

We all had fun, and it was way less painful than throwing a big birthday party.

The kids had their own "cabin" within our room, but the girls chose to sleep on the pull-out bed next to our bed. AWWWWWW.

Oh, and there was a fireplace and a balcony with a beautiful view of the parking lot. And lots of hairy backs (your welcome again!) everywhere.

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And guess which two kids fell asleep on the way home?

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Go on, guess!

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AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

Tidbits

Mitch was in Texas and Louisiana last week, where he bought alligator heads. And I'd like to say, no home should be without alligator heads. While he was gone, I found a good deal on a black wrought iron table and chair set. I've been looking for one for the girls' garden for a while. Unfortunately, it came in a big, flat box with a bag of screws and an allen wrench (Henry told me it was an allen wrench, but for all I know it could have been a steve wrench). Being married to Mitch has the advantage of never having to assemble anything myself, but with five days to go before he got home there was no way I was going to wait. I read the directions and put together four chairs and a table all by myself. I stepped back to admire my work, but was disappointed. They were sturdy enough, but didn't fit the whole "Children's Garden" theme I had going, so I spray painted everything pink. Cute, no? And, after he blew so much cash on alligator heads, how could Mitch be annoyed? Two wrongs make a right at our house. It's simple math. We spent the rest of last week with fevers and sickness.

Another new development around here is the arrival of another baby chick. The day Mitch, um, took care of Hef the Rooster, he grabbed a handful of eggs and tossed them into the incubator, and we all forgot about them. Three weeks later, Henry went into the garage and heard "cheep! cheep!" And there was a little chick, freshly hatched. We call him "HalfHef".

Yesterday was the big Memorial Day parade. Jack rode with his 4-H group, and Henry and Mitch rode on an old firetruck (a prize Hen won in a raffle). The girls and I were supposed to march with their t-ball team, but we're all effing sick. Again.

Pancakes

I followed the instructions perfectly. Dropped the batter onto the griddle and made smiley faces out of M&Ms. Butter, maple syrup.

"Why are you making pancakes, mommy?"

"Because Daddy's on a trip."

"We could have eggs or french toast."

"No, Sunday is Pancake Day. Don't worry, they'll taste great."

Three simultaneous bites. Sideways glances at each other. Big gulps of orange juice.

Sigh. "I'm sorry, I suck at making pancakes."

"That's okay, mom, you just have to chew them more and drink lots of juice."

"My tummy hurts."

"I want Daddy."

Mother's Day

So, I had a fab Mother's Day weekend, but first I'd like to give a shout out to my own mom, shown here with all of her grandkids. She's a great mom and the kind of nana who makes chocolate milk so thick you can chew it.


Saturday I went to Seattle to spend the day with my bff, Jessica. We shopped and lunched and had margaritas. For lunch! The stuff I bought before lunch was practical and boring. Pajamas, sunglasses, dumb stuff I needed. Now, going shopping after boozin' it up is funny. I got sucked into the vortex of the jewelry department and Jessica couldn't find me. She thought I was passed out on the floor between the racks, because that what she would be doing if she hadn't been looking for me. On the ferry ride home, I admired all the weird crap I bought, then hid it at the bottom of my bags.

Mother's Day was lovely. I woke up to breakfast in bed and beautiful flower leis made by the girls from the rhodies in their garden. Homemade cards and a card from Jack that he walked to town to buy. Over 5 miles round trip! He said he thought I'd appreciate it more if it was store-bought, since I know how tight he is with his money. Mitch spent most of the day cleaning my car out, because the 10 minutes he spent in it shuttling the girls to their t-ball game sent him over the edge. Jack pressure-washed the sports court, Henry cleaned up some dog poop, and the girls pestered me about the temperature outside, and if it was warm enough to go on the Slip N'Slide I'd brought home yesterday. As soon as the thermometer said 62 degrees, they were in their suits and ready. Ah, the Pacific Northwest.


Jack was too cool to try it and Grace was too, um, uncoordinated to figure it out, but she looked cute in her suit, by golly!

And finally, perhaps the biggest WTF prize for things I bought while tipsy goes to this wine stopper:

I know. There are no words.