Well, it's been 2 months since we moved in and our garage still looks like this.

I thought about working on it today, but I decided to just take a picture of it, post it, and call it a day.

He's so cute, I don't even mind picking up his poop.

Today we had Erika, Thelonious, and Ione up for a visit. We took them to the kids' favorite place, Fort Casey. Grace thought all these little alcoves were places she could pose, a'la the Blessed Mother or some other holy or unholy icon.

Henry entertained Thelonious with tales of his favorite book, "Super Diaper Baby" which is all about poop. One of his favorite topics. Once, the day after he had eaten corn for dinner, Henry was in the bathroom for a very, very long time. When he finally came out, he said, "Why do people even bother eating corn?"

Both J and H are very entrepreneurial, but in very different ways. J likes to have lemonade stands and do extra chores for money, and he socks it away carefully. H likes to get money without actually having to work for it. He got a metal detector for Christmas and made a bunch of money when Santa sprinkled coins all over the yard. He also will dance or dress in drag for a dollar. His latest scheme is his best. We have a little water feature/pond out front. H's going to put a sign out that says "Make a Wish", so when people come over they'll put money in the fountain and he'll collect it after they leave.

"H, what makes you think people will throw money in the fountain?"

"I'm going to put all my metal detector money in there before anyone comes over, so they get the idea. Sometimes you gotta spend money to make money, mom. I saw that on SpongeBob."

My house is rarely all clean at the same time, but this has never been more apparent than today. I spent the morning cleaning while the girls played happily with their dollhouses and the boys were at school. H walked in the front door after school and wailed, "are we moving again?"

"No, why do you ask?"

"The whole house is clean!"

"Mommy, can I cut my Barbie's hair?"

"No, because you probably won't like it and it's a new Barbie and I'm not going to buy you a new one." Lots of carrying on, so I decide to let her do it and learn a lesson.

"Well, G, how do you like it?"

"I don't."

"You know I'm not buying you a new one."

"That's okay, I'll get some money from Grandpa!"

In the 7 weeks we've lived here, I've heard the occasional jet noise from the Naval Air Station up in Oak Harbor. They have a remote touch and go landing strip down here in Coupeville, and today I got to experience these Prowlers firsthand. There's no way to describe the noise. I was in the kitchen feeding the youngest kids when I heard the loudest, thundering noise. The kids jumped from their seats. O grabbed her plate of food and ran into a closet. G ran for her baby doll so she could cover it's ears. I made a beeline for the internet so I could research whether or not my kids could get hearing damage. With no hesitation whatsoever, H ran outside, screaming, "THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!" The jets go right over our house, very low, and have been going at it all morning. It's quite spectacular, but I'm glad it doesn't happen too often, and I'm very glad I don't have a newborn. It reminds me of the time I was a new mother and week-old J refused to sleep. Finally, he drifted off only to have the Blue Angels go screaming over our Magnolia house and wake him up repeatedly. I went a little crazy and called the Seattle City Council, the Mayor's office, and the Port of Seattle to complain. I'm sure all the people that took my call that day got a good laugh about the crazy postpartum lady on the phone. I lifted this photo from the Navy's website because they were too fast for my crummy camera.`

Yesterday the kids and I went to the big city. We were gone about 9 hours and only got a few of our errands done, but I loved it. I couldn't find my cell phone, so I borrowed Mitch's. Of utmost importance was buying Jack some shoes. His feet had grown 2 sizes, and I was feeling like a crummy mom, but when I told him the order of our business, he balked. "I'm going to pick the first pair I see. I hate shopping for shoes!" 2 hours and 5 stores later, Mr. Picky finally found a pair he could live with, which were not on sale, of course, but by then I would have traded one of the twins for a pair of shoes he liked. At one point, while the three youngest were playing hide-and-seek under the shoe racks, Grace glimpsed herself in one of those little shoe mirrors. Earlier that morning, she had brought me about 6 hair things and gave me instructions on how to do her hair. After she saw it in the mirror, in the middle of a very crowded store, she shrieked, "WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY HAIR! I DIDN'T WANT THE FLOWER BARRETTES ON THE TOP!!!!! IT LOOKS TERRIBLE!!!!" She carried on and on. Sure Jack, you can get those expensive shoes. Let's. Just. Get. Out. Of. Here.

When we got back in the car I got a call from Mitch.

"Hi honey, the Coupeville Liquor store called. They found your cell phone."

We had a much-too-brief visit with the Gesingers and Grace admired Jessica's new Snow White hair-do. Thankfully there were no misplaced barrettes in it. Picked up Hunter and headed to a Gano birthday party at Pump It Up where the kids and I bounced for a couple hours. It was a blast, but I had taken pain killers for a headache, and forgot about my pulled muscle. Couldn't move when I woke up today. We brought Hunter back home, driving by our old house. "What a dump!" said the ever-charming H. Went to Costco, which wasn't too bad for some reason. I think I was just so happy to be around lots of people. We were the last car on the ferry and the ride home was very peaceful. Just as we were coming up our driveway, though:

"Mom?"

"Yes, J?"

"These shoes aren't very comfortable."

Every night at dinner, we go around the table and ask each person what their best and worst things were about the day. Last night, J said, "I didn't really have a best thing. I guess winning the spelling bee at school." What? First let me say that I am a failed Oregon state spelling bee contestant. Spelling is very dear to my heart and my idea of a good time is playing computer Scrabble. "So what's the next step?" I say, trying to sound calm and hold back visions of J entering the National Spelling Bee wearing a black satin robe with the words, "Jack Spellington" embroidered on the back, punching the air with little pocket dictionaries.

"Oh, I told my teacher I wasn't interested in competing. I only entered the spelling bee because they made us. Spelling's boring, mom." You can imagine what I'm thinking here. I'm trying not to start screeching like a monkey while at the same time respecting his choice. Monkey screeching won out. I stopped short of paying him to continue. We'll see what he decides to do, but I'm buying three yards of black satin just in case...

We just got our first copy of the Whidbey News-Times. Mitch and I were rolling on the floor as we read the Island County Sherriff's Report. Most of the crimes reported involved downed trees. Here are the most egregious crimes:

1/9/07-At 11:18 an Oak Harbor caller reported an empty refrigerator in front of a residence. He was concerned a child might get stuck inside.

1/6/07 A caller reported a beer bottle must have been thrown in the back of his pickup, because he didn't know where it came from.

At 3:03 a Coupeville caller asked about noise ordinances and wondered if it was legal to run a generator all night long.

At 11:10, an Oak Harbor caller reported that he was assaulted by his wife who grabbed him very hard in the testicles.

1/5/07, At 8:06 pm and Oak Harbor caller reported neighbors having a loud party with music and voices. The caller also thought the neighbors' smokestack wasn't up to code.

Well, G finally said those words we've been both expecting and dreading:

"I have a boyfriend, Daddy!"

M about crapped his pants, and I could easily read his thoughts, and they were something along the lines of shotguns and a giant padlock.

Preschool has opened up a whole new world for G, and despite the fact that there are only four boys in her class, she's got three of them already doing her bidding. Before nap today we were reading a fairy tale and the princess was only dancing with the prince. G was concerned that the princess wasn't giving the other men a chance.

"When I'm a real princess I'm not going to just dance with one handsome prince. I'm going to dance with all of them!"

Mh is at the hardware store today buying lumber for a very, very, tall, doorless tower.

O is practicing for her next stint on QVC. G is possessed. Note the pajamas O is wearing. She's had them on for 48 hours. That's my Island Girl!

Tonight, they were in the bathtub bathing their bald baby dolls, and talking about being mommies.

"What do mommies do, anyway?" I say, wondering if they'll wax poetic about all the wonderful things I do for them.

"Well, when I'm a mommy", G says, "I'm not going to make gross dinners like you."

"Mommies wipe up pee and poop." O says.

H, eavesdropping from his bedroom, yells, "and they make out with Daddies!"

We had a great time playing with sisters and cousins this weekend. O's highlight was holding Mack's puppy Roxie on her lap and petting her. And holding her. Around the neck in case she tried to get away from the loving petting. G enjoyed playing barbies and dolls with Aunt Kimmie and Mackenzie. She learned what a "Hoochie Mama Barbie" is. H loved hanging with Anthony. And he apparently fell asleep in the snow while the moms were away and Dad was in charge. J's favorite thing was playing Apples to Apples with his tipsy parents and aunties.

My favorite thing was probably spending the day shopping with my sisters. We left all the kids but Mackenzie with M. This is when H took a nap in the snow. I also enjoyed H's basketball game, which most of us attended. H is a killer on the court. When someone finally passed the ball to him, he ducked. Then he said he wanted to come out of the game because he had the hiccups.

Aside from my sweatpants and pajamas, there were some serious fashion infractions. Marci wore hot pink fuzzy socks with opened back shoes to Seattle Premium Outlet mall. My stomach still hurts from laughing as Kim and I walked behind her, with her metallic pink and silver dog carrier "purse". She rocked the bargains, as usual, though. Kim and I tried stuffing our muffin-tops into Lucky jeans. I didn't feel so lucky after my twinskin flapped over the top. Fear of predators prevents me from posting a picture of Henry dressed in drag, complete with wig, acid wash mini skirt, and pink plastic mules. Poor Anthony had a Seahawks coat with a broken zipper. Kim vowed to buy him a new one when we were out shopping, but was blinded by the Coach Outlet and not a word was mentioned of little Anthony or the frigid temperatures...at least she got a new Coach! Reminded me of the time she brought Anthony and his highly contagious Hand, Foot, and Mouth disease to a purse party after he had been sent home from camp. I can see 24 year-old Anthony in therapy now. The therapist will lift up Coach purses and Anthony will dissolve into a puddle of screaming behind the couch. Perhaps the worst fashion faux pas of all is this photo of Kim, and her imitation of an Island Grandma. To be fair to her, I made her try this hat on in the store. Nice bag, Kim!

Sigh. When we first moved here, I was in a shop and I overheard the owner saying she hadn't worn jeans in years. "Only elastic waists for me!" I shuddered when I heard this, vowing I would not be one of "those" people. I owned one velour sweat outfit, and I only wore it Sunday mornings. I NEVER went out in public in it. Over the past few weeks, however, my wardrobe has mysteriously morphed. Since I never go anywhere much, I hope out of the shower and simply "pull" on some pants. Sweatpants. Since I only had one pair, I of course had to wear M's. He only has a few pairs, too, and he actually wears them to go to physical therapy, so what's a girl to do? Yes, I've resorted to getting right back into pajamas after my shower in the mornings. The first time I did this, I got one raised eyebrow from my loving husband, but now, the plaid flannel is just part of the landscape around here. My sisters and their kids are coming for the weekend today, so I dressed up. I put on some elastic waist microfleece sweats. But they're black, so they look very dressy. Very klassy.

Snow Day

Four hours after H's prayers are answered.

School got out early and is likely cancelled tomorrow. I wish I had his connections!

H the bible thumper....

Yesterday we had no power for most of the day. The wind was blowing so hard that Seamus was too afraid to go out and do his business. Naturally I stepped in a big pile of dog poop on the stairs when I went down at midnight to check on things. Gross! Anyway, today we were expecting snow. H woke up at 5:30, ran to the window, and burst into tears when he saw that there was no snow. All morning he moaned about it. Then, he said, "Mom, does God hear everything we say?"

"Uh, um, I think so, but He doesn't always answer our prayers, H."

"I've been very good, I'm going to pray for snow!"

He goes to the window and I see his eyes squeezed tightly shut, praying with all his might.

Two seconds later you can't see three feet for all the snow. It's a freaking blizzard!

Now H is a member of the God Squad. He just went up to pray for school to be cancelled. Oy.

H is helping us redecorate the new house. At first, when he realized swinging from the towel bar wasn't the best idea, he burst into tears, but he recovered quickly enough to say, "It's a good thing I got rid of that for you mom. You said you hated that ugly old brass towel rack. Now you can get a new one. Just sell this one on e-bay!" Which means I'll have to replace the brass fixtures throughout the entire bathroom. Of course M said if we do that, we might as well re-tile the shower and replace the countertops. If we do that though, he thought we should also add a second vanity sink. Thanks, H!

Today the boys and I decided to finally see where the trail accross the road leads. There was an Indian chief's grave, then down, down, down to the beach! There was an ancient, barely readable sign that said private property, so of course J would not allow us to linger on what might be someone's private beach. We took the road back up and somebody driving down it stopped to let the boys play with her 8 week old Golden Retriever that she had just picked up from the breeder. Soooo cute, but all those piles of pee and poop are still too fresh in my mind.

How we're doing on our New Year's Resolutions:

M is doing great.

I have sworn twice (that I've been caught) and I've been forced to eat Bertie Bott's every flavor beans: Vomit flavor and Soap flavor. Also, every time I get on the treadmill to work on my secret NYR, the power goes out. The Island wants me to be flabby.

J is getting very close to thinking about maybe asking a kid over to shoot some hoops.

H is not yet considering his 2 days of sugar free-ness. He's got a whole year, after all.

O has not asked again about riding a horsie, and I'm thanking my lucky stars.

G is still looking for a unicorn and she got in a knock-down drag-out fight with Henry when he had the audacity to suggest they don't exist. Grace won the fight.

I hate New Year's resolutions.

Who can spot the fruit of my loins?

One reason I love Coupeville:

I signed H up for basketball 2 days ago. In Shoreline, you have to sign kids up for sports like a year in advance and fill out all kinds of liability forms, medical release forms, copies of birth certificate, proof that your kid doesn't have some kind of debilitating disease, etc. The coach he'd been assigned to called me the next day and simply asked for my email address so I could have the game schedule.

"What about all the forms?" I said.

"Oh, I think we need your address and phone number. We'll get it later. We're just here to have some fun."

So I am stressing out during the first half of the game because I haven't filled out any paperwork, sent in a fee, etc. Then the coach's wife came over and stressed the importance of the snack sign-up and I felt much better.

"Does it have to be whole grain sugar-free and nut-free with no high-fructose corn syrup?"

"Well, we brought the snack today and it's rice crispy treats and juice boxes."

I freaking love it here! But will I fit in?